Blonde's Bad Dream

on Aug, 07 2011 5788 views

One day a blonde kept having the same weird dream everyday, so she went to her doctor.

Doctor: What was your dream about?
Blonde: I was being chase by a vampire!

Doctor: (giggles quitely) So... what is the scenery like?
Blonde: I was running in a hall way.

Doctor: Then what happened?

Blonde: Well that's the weird thing. In every single dream, the same thing happened. I always come to this door, but I can't open it. I keep pushing the door and pushing the door, but it wouldn't budge!

Doctor: Does the door have any letters on it?
Blonde: Yes it did.

Doctor: And what did these letter spell?
Blonde: It said "Pull"


Fruity Punishment

One day three salesmen went to a farmer. They asked him if he wanted to buy some of their products. He said, "All right. Wait here until I come back with the money...-but don't touch my daughter while I'm gone!"

When he came back, he found them all on top of his daughter. He pointed his shotgun at them and said ,"Go out to my garden, pick 10 things, and come back in here."

The first salesman came in there with 10 cherries. The farmer goes, "Ok, shove them up your butt and you can go." So, not wanting to be shot, the salesman shoved the cherries up his butt and he was free to go

The second salesman came in with 10 oranges. Again, the farmer told him to shove them up his butt. After he had done that, the salesman started laughing. The farmer asked, "what's so funny?"

The salesman replies, "The other guy's out there picking watermelons."