One night, after closing time a barman is sitting at his bar minding his own buisiness, when a spectral hound floats in through the door.
The barman, being an exceptionally cool kind of guy, asks "yeah, what do you want?".
The phantom hound explains, in a haunting voice "I've lost my tail...... and cannot rest until a kindly barman stitches it back-on".
At this request the barman stands back astonished and says to the phantom dog..... "Sorry, but we don't re-tail spirits at this time of night".