You might be a redneck if...You think a chain saw is a musical instrument. You've ever stolen clothes from a scarecrow. The most commonly heard phrase at your family reunion is "What the h--l are you looking at, Sh-thead?"You think that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups. You've ever shot a deer from inside your house. The first words out of your mouth every time you see friends are "Howdy!", "HEY!" or "How Y'all Doin'?" (If they respond with the same... they're a redneck too!)You have more than two brothers named Bubba or Junior. You've ever stolen toilet paper from a public restroom. You clean your nails with a stick.You prefer car keys to Q-tips.