A man went out drinking with his friends and came home the next morning to find his wife waiting for him. He apologized for worrying her but proceeded to tell her that he had been in the most elegant bar in the world! "Everything was gold.. the carpets, the glasses, the cutlery, the curtains and even the urinal. Here... I have a book of matches in my pocket. Phone if you don't believe me."The incredulous wife did just that and asked the manager, "Is everything in your establishment really gold?""Yes," he replied, "everything is gold colored.""Even the urinal?" she queried.The manager put his hand over the phone and said to his bartender, "This is the wife of that guy who relieved himself in the tuba last night."