Gorilla Warfare

on Apr, 13 2012

Gorilla Warfare

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Naughty Pastors

Three pastors and their wives were car-pooling their way back from a
revival when suddenly their van slid off the side of a cliff. Sadly, they
were all killed.

At the Pearly Gates, Peter called the first couple forward. Looking
through his book, Peter looked up at the first preacher sharply, "You
hypocrit!" he boomed, "All you ever cared about in your life was money!
Money is evil, money won't buy you happiness! Yet you've hoarded money all
your life! You were the wealthiest person in your whole community. In
fact, you were so consumed with money that you married a woman named
Penny, isn't that so?" he demanded.

Obviously shaken, the preacher meekly responded, "Y-yes, Sir, That's
true." "Well, you did preach the gospel, so I won't send you off to
you-know-where, but you don't get to come in the front gate. You have to
walk all the way around heaven and enter in the back door. Off you go!"
And the couple went shamefully on their way.

St. Peter leered at the next pastor, "And you!" Peter hissed. "All you
ever talked and cared about was Alcohol! The bottle this and the bottle
that. Yet, you've been drunk nearly every time you preached. In fact, you
were so consumed with alcohol and drinking that you married a woman named
Brandy, is that so!?" he accused. The pastor only nodded in shame. "Well,
but you preached a powerful sermon -- despite being drunk -- so no hell
for you either. But you don't get to come in the front gate either. You
have to walk all the way around heaven and enter in the back door." And
the couple slowly shuffled off.

"And you!" St. Peter began.The third Pastor held up his hand to silence
St. Peter and turned to his wife and said, "We'd better start walkin',
Fanny."

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